These Feelings
by Karin Snow
Summary: Karma is feeling something strange. He's not sick, and it only happens when Nagisa is around. So is it love? But there's no way he could confess since it would kill their friendship. In the end, will their love bloom?
1. Chapter 1 Feelings Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 1. Feelings Time!**

 **Author's Note: Hello! So this is my first fanfiction and my way of writing is still rather clumsy. But I hope that you guys like it. Here we go!**

Karma has been feeling something strange. He was definitely not sick, since he doesn't feel tired at all (well, even if he does, he's not going to admit it). He felt… flustered and butterflies seemed to be travelling in his stomach. But the strange thing is, it only happened when Nagisa was around. He was so sure it was the hidden bloodlust that he only found out recently. He _**was**_ so sure.

There was no way it was something else except for bloodlust. It's not like he liked Nagisa or anything like that… _right_? Yep! Definitely- there was _no_ way. No way…

He was too focused and engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't realize Nagisa, who was already standing beside him. He flinched as the blue haired boy called his name.

" _Karmaaaaaaaa-kuuuuuun!"_

That _feeling_ again. He brushed it off as if he was a boy who got an iPad and his old worn-out toy. He answered, probably sounded a bit grumpy.

" _Yo, Nagisa-kun! Yeah?"_

" _Do you want to go eat lunch with me?"_

" _Sure…"_ Why was his heart beating so fast?

They ate their lunch under a big tree along with Kayano, Maehara, Isogai, and Okuda. Maehara suddenly asked-

" _Karma, are you dating anyone?"_

Karma almost choked on his food. But fortunately, he successfully remained calm and reserved. He felt like this was the topic he wanted to avoid the most.

If he doesn't answer, answer too fast or even hesitate to answer- they would find something suspicious. Especially, the person who is sitting right next to him with pigtails the same color as the sky. But, there isn't anything suspicious and what does any of this has to do with Nagisa? Everything flips his mind in less than three second.

" _Ah, no. I don't have anyone now"_ , he answered confidently, but inside, he was panicking.

" _Do you need me to introduce you to someone?"_ Maehara teased.

" _Nah. That would make me feel like you're some kind of aunty who likes to introduce people"_

" _Hey!"_

" _Besides, how would you know you like someone?"_ Karma asked. It was simply a casual question.

" _Ah~ Seems like Karma had no experiences in love, eh? ~"_ , Maehara hasn't learned his lesson and he continued with the teasing.

" _What about you? You breaks up every time."_ This definitely kept his mouth shut about unnecessary things.

" _Ah, well. When you're in love, your heart beats faster, you feel flustered, and you get butterflies in your stomach"_ , Maehara said, sounded like a love expert.

Karma's heart skipped a beat, isn't _**that**_ what he was feeling? He glanced over at Nagisa. The sun was shining through Nagisa's beautiful blue hair. His ocean blue eyes sparkled, as if they were a pair of big, precious sapphires. Under Karma's eyes, Nagisa was surrounded by stars- many wonderful stars.

That night, Karma flopped on his bed. So that _was_ love? So, he really loved Nagisa? At that moment, he was conflicted between two decisions. He was selfish and he didn't want to let this feeling go away. It would hurt him. But on the other hand, if he forced Nagisa, he would hurt him.

 _ **What will he do? Did that mean he had to confess?**_

It was the first time, Akabane Karma, has ever experienced love. Also, it has while since the last time he was _this_ worried.

 _Nagisa-kun is a guy, so he probably will just be gross out. If I confessed, we may not be friends anymore. Am I brave enough to take this risk? Even if I'm not, I don't think I'll be able to see the person I love as my friend any longer._

Karma sighed. Who knew love was so complicated? But, when you fall into it, there's no way to get out. It's like a spider web, and he was just one of those flies.

A hopeless, little fly.

* * *

 _Meanwhile, at the Shiota Resident-_

" _ **I'M YOUR MOTHER! DON'T FORGET THAT YOU CAN LIVE BECAUSE OF ME! I DID EVERYTHING FOR YOU! ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS TO LISTEN TO ME"**_

Nagisa collapsed at the corner of his bed. His hair flowed down, as messy as it can get. Somehow, he found himself in a pink dress with little purple bows.

" _Don't you ever dare to deny your mother ever again!"_

 _To be continued….._

 **Author's Note:** **So this is my first fan fiction chapter, I hope that you enjoyed it. The fluff didn't come out yet but I can guarantee that it will. Also, Karma seems to be just a little bit out of character. But you know what they say, _people change when they're in love… )_**


	2. Chapter 2 Denial Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 2. Denial Time!**

 **Author's Note: Being a newbie, I am very happy to see how many people followed my story. Thank you so much! I'm also sorry in advance for the cursed words if you don't like them, but I hope it will be more Karma-** _ **ish**_ **now.**

Yeah right- this _is_ Karma we're talking about… So, there's no way he could _ever_ fall in love.

Karma sighed. Yeah, like _that_ could happen.

 _Shit, when did I start to feel this way about Nagisa-kun?_ _Give up Karma! What the fuck, like Nagisa-kun would love you back, he's a guy! Maybe I just like Nagisa-kun because he looks like a girl! Yeah… maybe that's it._

Suddenly, he heard a loud thud on the wall. Then, he saw a pale white hand knocking on the window. _"Knock, knock, knock…"_

If Karma was a normal person, shivers would've ran down his back, and he would've already ran away. Not to mention, it was almost midnight by then. But, being the fearless person that he was, Karma came over to the window and opened it.

As he opened the window, the night breeze entered into his room. It was cold and unforgiving, but Karma didn't care about it. The thing that surprised him the most was seeing Nagisa who was sitting on one of the branches that belonged to the tree outside of Karma's room. Beautiful stars were surrounding him, Nagisa, wrapping him in their arms.

" _What are you doing here?"_ Karma said with a surprised tone.

" _I-I'll explain later…"_ Nagisa voice was trembling in fear.

The blue hair teen gently put his shaking hand on Karma's reached out arm. His hand was small and cold. But, Karma's hand was the opposite, it was bigger and so much warmer. It somehow warmed up not only Nagisa's hand but also his heart.

Nagisa made a big leap through the window. Once he made it safely into the room, Karma could finally take a clear look at the other person. One look, and you can clearly see the red head's face confuse and angry.

" _Nagisa-kun, what the heck happened to you?"_ , Karma exclaimed in shock.

" _I…my mother… she made me… this dress…"_ was all Nagisa muttered. He was traumatized.

Karma's hand clenched into a fist, he understood what Nagisa was trying to say.

 _What kind of mother is that? What a disgusting monster!_

In a flash, he had the urge to protect the person in front of him no matter what, to keep him away from all dangers. Before he could fight it back, he was already hugging the small, frail body.

" _Karma-kun…"_

Karma could hear Nagisa's sulking and wondered if Nagisa could hear his heart beating at the speed of a cheetah. His breath was hot. When he finally let go of the other person, he saw tears streaming down the other boy's face. It hurt him to see Nagisa like that.

Karma put his hand on Nagisa's forehead. It was almost as hot as boiling water. _It's a fever._ He reached in his messy drawer and found a thermometer. It was 38 degrees.

" _Nagisa-kun, you should lay down. But first, do you want to take a quick shower?"_ Karma asked in a worried tone.

" _Yeah."_ Nagisa answered with such a small voice; Karma could barely hear it.

After handing Nagisa some clothes, Karma sat down and tried to think straight. To think about Nagisa's mother, his fever, school, and finally found himself worried for Nagisa so much that he actually felt sick himself.

 _What the heck happened to you Karma? Nagisa-kun is a guy! A guy! Are you going gay?! These crappy feelings will eventually go away, right?_

 _If so, why is my heart saying something different?_

 **Author's Note: I'm sorry it's so short, writer's blocks are evil! I also just want to wrap this chapter up so it can fit it's name nicely. Next chapter is going to be " _Sleep-over Time!_ ", bet that you're fangirling over this name XD. Anyway, good bye for now!**


	3. Chapter 3 Sleep-over Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 3. Sleep-over Time**

 **Author's Note: Fluffy, that's all I can say about this chapter. So NEVER look at fan art or read fan fiction in public. Unless you want to see weird looks from strangers just because you're grinning from ear to ear like Koro-sensei and trying to hold back your screams(I experienced it once). Also, I'll start to go to school around next week, so update will be a bit slower (probably once a week).**

Karma broke out of his thinking mode as he heard Nagisa calling his name.

" _Karma-kun!"_

" _Coming!"_ He responded.

Karma stopped once he made his way to the bathroom. Nagisa was wearing Karma's shirt and shorts. It was all a bit too big for him, but he could wear anything, as long as it's not a dress. His arms and legs were covered with bruises. Karma couldn't have seen it before since the dress had long sleeves.

" _What is it?"_ the redhead asked. Usually, he would tease Nagisa for looking like a girl, but he's not a heartless person.

" _Ah… It's just… Do you have any spare toothbrushes?"_ Nagisa asked in a soft voice.

" _Yeah, it's in the cupboard. Right here."_ Karma felt like chuckling for a bit. Nagisa just looked so cute.

The taller teen handed Nagisa a blue toothbrush.

 _ **Silence…**_

" _Nagisa-kun, does it hurt?"_ Karma questioned broke the silence. You could feel in his tone that he was worried.

" _No, it doesn't hurt at all!"_ the teen answered in a cheerful tone and showed one of his deceiving smiles.

" _Stop lying!"_ Karma shouted. He felt angry because Nagisa didn't trust him.

" _Kinda…"_ Nagisa admitted. He hung his head low.

Karma reached out for the medical box under the sink and started to put medicines and ban-aids on it once they're in the room again. He might not know how to treat a fever, but at least he knew what to do with cuts and bruises. Nagisa stayed silence the whole time, but judging from his, Karma knew that is friend just wanted to scream.

" _You can squeak a little, you know."_

" _What…?"_ Nagisa asked, confused.

" _I know it hurts…"_ Karma said. _Like no one is going to notice that he's clenching his teeth._

Nagisa blushed. _How does he know I'm trying to hold back? Is he telepathic or what? This is so embarrassing…_

Karma stared at his best friends face. Nagisa's face is completely red. If this was a cartoon, there would be smoke from his ears. _Dammit, why is he blushing? And why is he so cute?A why am I calling Nagisa cute?_ Staring at Nagisa's blushed face for a while made Karma himself blush too. He immediately put his hand on the blue hair teen's forehead.

" _Do you feel tired?"_

" _Yea…Yeah! I guess…"_ Nagisa stuttered.

Karma put a fever pad on Nagisa's forehead. He stood up. Nagisa suddenly grabbed him by the finger.

" _Are…are you going somewhere?"_ Nagisa asked, confused.

" _Eh? I'm going to and sleep in the guest bedroom,"_ Karma answered with a relax tone.

" _No, please don't go. I don't want to be alone. That's why I came over here, so please!"_ Nagisa begged. He narrowed his eyebrows.

Karma could feel his heart soften. He tried to deny his feelings for Nagisa, but he had to stop. Because at that moment, he understood that he loved Nagisa with all his heart. It didn't matter how much he teased Nagisa from before, what mattered now was that he loves Nagisa.

Though, this did sound weird to come from him.

" _I'll do whatever you want me too then, Nagisa-kun,"_ Karma answered. The answered made Nagisa blush once again.

They both got on the bed. Once they got under the blanket, they couldn't sleep right away, so they basically just gazed at each other. Their face were just about an inch away. Nagisa's beautiful blue hair spread across the pillow. His face was so pretty.

" _Hey?"_ Karma started at first, pausing for a while.

" _Yeah? Karma-kun?"_ Nagisa whispered.

" _So, it was your mother?"_ Karma didn't intend to, but he wanted to know what happened.

" _Karma-kun, I… Just don't do anything bad…"_ the thoughts of Karma fighting with his own mother made him scared.

" _I won't, but why did it turn out like this?"_ Karma continued.

" _I… rebelled_ ," he blurted out.

"… _?!"_

" _I told her that I want to cut my hair… again"_ , the way he said it made it sound like a confession.

" _Nagisa-kun, that's-"_ Karma didn't know what to think. Knowing Nagisa's mother, that sounded dangerous.

" _So when she had a one day business trip, I sneaked out. I just went to the house I felt was the closest, so…"_ Karma could feel that his love is feeling very vulnerable just by his shaking voce. But at the same time, he also felt disappointed that Nagisa came over to his house just because it's close…

Karma embraced Nagisa. He put his head on the other's shoulder. He stroked Nagisa's hair with one hand. It was utterly soft. With his other hand, he squeezed Nagisa tight and patted his back. He then looked straight into Nagisa's eyes. The other teen blushed as he stared at Karma's bright mercury orbs.

" _I know you're going to cry, so why don't you let it all out?"_ his voice was more consulting and soft than anything.

Nagisa buried his face in Karma's chest. When he think about his mother, his father, school, assassination. He bursted out crying, his tears became two small rivers down his chin.

Karma just stayed silent. Nagisa had fallen asleep by his chest, his tears leaving stains on his pale cheeks. Karma's mind delved into many thoughts, watching over his love's figure. He seemed so heavenly, almost like an angel, brought to him- but he was nothing but a fallen angel, his wings broken, who had unbelievable bloodlust.

 _Because I love you, I can't help but feel hurt when you are as well. You don't know how much my heart suffers just from loving you nor about my feelings for you. Soon you will, love, when time's right for us._

 **Author's Note: Apparently I forgot about the honorifics until this chapter. For those who wonder, I wrote the conversations in italic mode because… I don't know, I just feel like to distinguish the conversations and the narrator. Anyway, I love your reviews (they inspired my days), and thank you so much for following and made this story your favorite. Bye bye for now.**


	4. Chapter 4 Morning Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 4. Morning Time!**

 **Author's Note: Hello guys! After a few days of procrastination, I'm finally in the mood to write :3 Anyway, enjoy the story and please support the story by following, favorite or reviewing.**

The sunlight in the morning through the window was blinding.

Karma opened his eyes. It was Saturday and he didn't have to go to school- it's not like he really cared about it. He's the kind of guy that felt grumpy in the morning, but when he saw Nagisa who was curled up next to him, all of his negativity was gone, all left was his loving feelings towards him.

The red head moved his hand and stroked Nagisa's hair. It was so soft and soothing, kind of like an angel's hair. He chuckled at Nagisa's face, it was peaceful and cute. And his lips… looked so soft. He wanted put his own against those, but his mind stopped him from doing that.

 _What if Nagisa wakes up when I kissed him? He will feel disgusted and get grossed out. If I want to confess my feelings, I should do it in a much proper way. But then… in Nagisa's heart, he likes girls,_ _ **not**_ _guys. Hah, it's so weird for me to think about these kinds of stuff._

After some excessive thinking, he decided to let his mind let loose for a moment. He raised one hand and pinched Nagisa by the cheek.

" _Ow! Karma-kun?"_ Nagisa seemed confused. For a moment, he forgot that he was in Karma's house.

Nagisa then remembered what happened last night and at the same time realized that he was hugging Karma's torso quite tightly. His face went as red as a tomato. He let go of his friend's body.

" _Ah, I… I'm sorry!"_ he stuttered, not knowing what to say except that.

" _Why say sorry? And more importantly, why are you blushing?"_ Karma had started his everyday teasing ritual.

Nagisa didn't know what to say. Why _was_ he blushing? He looked at Karma and he stared back. They sat there for what seemed like hours, just looking into each other eyes. Finally, Karma spoke-

" _Are you hungry?"_

" _Ah, yeah!"_

" _Then let's go downstairs, and how about some cereal?"_

" _Sure…"_

They made their way down the vintage wooden stairs and went to the kitchen. The kitchen was dark and empty. Karma turned the lights on and started searching inside a cupboard.

" _Where are all the people?"_

" _They're only here when me, or my parents want them to, and I prefer my own food."_

" _I see. Are_ your _parents traveling again?"_ Nagisa asked, he knew fully well that Karma's parents traveled a lot. But he didn't know whether Karma should feel lucky or unlucky compared to his mother.

" _Yeah, to Argentina,"_ Karma then pulled out a few boxes of cereal.

They took the cereal and milk to the long dining table. Sitting at something like that made Nagisa feel like a king. He wished he was a real king though, just so that his mother can't control him anymore. Karma's voice broke his train of thoughts.

" _Hey! When will your mother be home?"_

" _Heh? Uh… probably in the afternoon_ ," the blue haired teen was confidently sure with his answer.

" _You're sure you're okay?"_ Karma was slightly worried.

" _Yeah, why would you think I wouldn't be okay?"_ Nagisa asked. Nagisa had never seen Karma being worried. It was an unbelievable thing to see.

" _Well, you were hugging me pretty tight,"_ his voice mocking Nagisa and a smirk grew on his face.

Nagisa could feel heat creeping in his cheek. Karma chuckled at his adorable crush's expression.

" _You're so cute Nagisa-kun!"_ , the sentence made the shorter teen blushed, but his voice was calmer.

" _Karma-kun, though I know you didn't mean anything by it, but I'm a guy you know, being cute are for girls_ ," Karma could tell by Nagisa's voice that he was serious even if he was still blushing.

 _Nagisa-kun, I actually meant a lot of things by that. How can I make you happy when we're both guys?_

Karma sighed.

The atmosphere got awkward after that. Nagisa was confused. _Why is he so quiet? Did I make him mad? What happened?_

They went back to Nagisa's home by the train. Silence filled the space between them while their minds were filled with voices.

They stopped in front of Nagisa's house.

" _Thank you for letting me to stay at your house_ ," Nagisa said in a soft voice.

" _No need to say thank you, we're_ _ **friends**_ _after all,"_ Karma muttered, accidently emphasized the word ' _friend'._

They said their goodbyes and separated their ways. Nagisa sighed in relief as he found no one at home. And Karma was walking on the street, deep in thoughts.

It's November and the days were becoming windier.

 _I love Nagisa-kun. But Nagisa-kun want to be a guy and I want him to be happy. I should get out of the way._

 **Author's Note: All I can say is… poor Karma! And also, thank you for reading "These Feelings". I'll try to update sooner. Leave a review if you feel like it.**


	5. Chapter 5 Distant Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 5. Distant Time**

 **Author's Note: Thank you Kikuue, Crimson Blue Assassin, Kanon58, Esdeath and any future reviewer for the last chapter! And yes, this story is going to have a happy ending. I'm so happy to see people supporting me, especially when I don't have any inspiration. It's like seeing lights at the end of the tunnel *v***

 **Warning: This chapter is pretty sad…**

One week had passed ever since that night. Nagisa and his mom made up… temporarily. Now, there's pretty much no reason for him to not be happy, except for one.

Since then, Karma and he- they talked less.

At first, everything seemed normal. But then, Nagisa had started to realize that they didn't go home together anymore _nor_ **did** they go home together. It was _weird._ They were best friends. But, was it just because they were beyond that relationship called _'friendship'_? It just felt so… _strange._

Every time he wanted to ask Karma about it, the redhead always changed the subject, or just flat out ignored him. It was frustrating. He was _so_ tired of it.

 _What happened? Did I upset him? Did I make him angry? I... don't understand. Is it like that time back in second year again?_

 _Why does it hurt so much?_

His heart was pounding quite loudly. Once again, he was not worthy enough to be Karma's friend. It was like failing a game after getting to the final level. But does failing a game hurt this much?

He wanted to ask Karma why. He wanted to go back being to being friends with him. He wanted to feel Karma's warmth. To talk to him. To laugh with him. And, to fix this weird aching feeling in his heart. He was determined to accomplish it.

 _Hey Karma-kun! Why are you doing this?_

At the same time, the blue-haired boy didn't realize that Karma was looking at him with his bright mercury eyes. He took a glance at Kayano who was standing near him and looked back at Nagisa with a cheerful smile.

" _They look like a good pair,"_ Karma's mind went hurting his battered heart. Just the thought was enough to make him feel like crying, even if he has been stone cold for years.

Every thought that consisted of him for a week now have been sad thoughts. And every one of them involved Nagisa, that blue head that shone his life ever since he had met him. He sighed deeply, with pure exhaustion mentally.

 _Nagisa-kun, I guess you will never know my feelings for you._

 _This is for the best._

Karma decided to go home two hours early. It was not suspecting of him to do so, though this time, there was a different reason. He didn't know that Nagisa was getting his own bag and followed the redhead.

Even if Karma was walking, he was still fast, Nagisa'll admit. It took a while for Nagisa to catch up.

The bluenette quickly grabbed Karma's shirt. Karma immediately turned his head back from surprise. The person he didn't want to see the most appeared right in front of his face. He fell in shock and stunned for a moment. He finally managed to even let out a stutter.

" _Why… why are you skipping class?"_ Karma could feel his heart beat louder- a surprise that Nagisa couldn't even hear.

" _I just want to ask you something_ ," Nagisa answered clearly. His face was dead serious, no smiles, just that look he had- that look, it was so dark and deadly.

" _Wh… What?"_ Karma tried to act like he didn't know anything, but that it was of no uttered use.

" _Why are you not talking to me anymore?"_

" _Nagis…"_ , before Karma could find an excuse, Nagisa interrupted with questions that's been

" _Did I do something wrong?! Did I make you angry? I don't know... but I want to keep being friends with you! Please don't be mad at me- please, don't hate me. I beg you,"_ Karma could feel Nagisa's voice tremble.

Karma clutched his hand into a fist. He knew exactly what Nagisa was going to do next, and it was the last and worst thing he wanted Nagisa to do… that was to-

 _Cry._

Nagisa's body was shaking. Warm tears were starting to run down his face. His eyes were swollen from crying. His face was completely red.

" _Please, don't cry…"_ Karma's voice was weak. He put one of his hands on Nagisa's face.

Nagisa didn't want to cry either. He would have stop crying if he could have help it, but the thoughts that were swarming him didn't let him. They told him if he stop crying, he would lose his precious friend forever, and dear God, he never want that to happen again.

" _Tell me why! I don't want this! Answer me!"_ Nagisa just kept on crying, though all of it it was more like screaming. It left his throat dry and out of breath.

 _Do you really need my answer?_

" _Answer me or I won't let you go!"_ Nagisa kept shouting, his voice cracking, almost being forced out.

Karma didn't know what to do. If he answered the darn question, he'd have to say _**that**_. Saying _**that**_ in a place and a time like this, he might as well be a jerk, which he was in the very first place.

Should he say it?

" _Okay…"_

Nagisa lifted his head up a little. His sapphire orbs met the other's amber eyes. Karma took a deep breath and took in the angelic face of Nagisa's- his cheeks coated with streams of tears. He closed his eyes and told him- only a split second for everything in his life to change.

" _I love you."_

 **Author's Note: I'm sorry for such a cliffhanger, but I like play with people's emotions. I'll try to update as soon as I can. In the meantime, please follow, favorite and review my work.**


	6. Chapter 6 Confession & Reaction Time

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 6. Confession and Reaction Time**

 **Author's Note: I want to thank you all the people who followed, favorited and reviewed the story. Now let's continue the cliffhanger!**

" _I love you,"_ Karma blurted out. Inside, he felt terrified and his mind froze over like the lakes at winter.

Nagisa was stunned. His mind was confused for a second but then, his face softened.

" _Ha ha ha. You're quite the joker. You're just trying to make me feel better, right?"_ this time Nagisa grabbed Karma by the hand, but the redhead just looked down and stared at the ground.

" _This isn't a joke, I truly am in love in you,"_ Karma muttered. He have never _ever_ , in his life, felt this breathless.

They stayed deep in silence for as long as they could remember. It was the most awkward, shocking, and nervous moment of their life. All they could hear was how the wind blew past their ears and how wild their hearts were beating.

" _Wha… What?!"_

Nagisa's eyebrows giving an expression where he was confused. He had thought that he had misheard Karma, but he hadn't. Karma's heart sunk, like how the Titanic did in the North Atlantic Ocean. He didn't even think to the extent back then that it would hurt _this_ much. Karma was sure that Nagisa was to show him a face of disgust next.

" _But… but I'm a guy,"_ Nagisa managed to whip up a few words, only to state the obvious in the most painful way. At that very moment, they were the worst words one could ever say to Karma.

In that span of few minutes, Karma had witnessed so many emotions swelling in him that he felt he could explode right now and there- like a bomb put in the room for someone to be killed.

He was happy; even relieved of letting his feelings all out. But, at the next few seconds, the sadness and sorrow went to engulf his heart full of love. He was scared and felt anxious that he won't be able to forget Nagisa in the future.

But just then he returned to reality, to the blue haired teen in front of him.

In front of Karma was the most beautiful person ever- an angel. His blue hair, flowing so aesthetically with the wind. Blue, bright eyes like sapphire gems. Those rose-colored moist lips. Pale and soft skin like silk.

All of that, will never be his, and he knew that. He loved Nagisa dearly, but that was all there was to it, right?

Maybe deep down, he knew that all of this will happen, sooner or later. There was only so much that he can say to his unrequited love.

" _I figured it would be like this… You shouldn't have followed me,"_ Karma smiled at Nagisa with pain smeared just right beneath it.

Karma leaned closer and planted a soft kiss on Nagisa's forehead. Just a peck. Just something that he hoped would heal at least some part of his broken heart. He yanked his hand away from Nagisa.

" _You should get back to class…"_ Karma smiled even more generously- so obvious the pain was there.

Karma walked down the hill, hands in his pockets.

Each step, further away from Nagisa. There was nothing to be sad about, Nagisa could be joyful and fully enjoy his life without him now, so he should be delighted as well.

If so-

 _Shit, why am I crying?_

Karma hasn't cried in so long. Not ever since he was very small and realized his parents won't be there for him, no matter what. Not ever since he realized his life was just going to be full of servants, so he kicked most of them out.

Couple of weeks ago, he wanted to get rid of these feelings, get rid of all of this stupid illusion called _'love'_. But now, he felt as if he could embrace it.

Even though tears were turning into rivers down his face, a faint smile formed on his lips.

 _I love you, Nagisa. I really, really do._

 _I love you._

Karma brought his sleeve up to his face and roughly wiped his tears. He threw his bag over his shoulder and walked, he walked as if he was trying to walk out of his nightmare.

* * *

That night, after dinner, Nagisa flopped onto his bed. He looked up at the ceiling and entered into the endless world of thoughts.

 _Karma-kun said he loved me today. So of course when his feelings are like that I can't be him anymore._

 _But… I want to talk with him again. I want to discuss about Sonic Ninja again. I want to be near him again._

 _I miss him._

Nagisa frowned. He wanted to cry but he couldn't. It looked like he already cried too much the other day. So much, that he was completely out of tears. It was times like these that he really wanted to cry.

Maybe, just maybe… that because Karma was there for him, to listen to all of his complaints, that he could cry. But Karma wasn't there in Nagisa's room, by Nagisa's side.

Nagisa was all alone. All by himself.

They both suffered from a sleepless night.

 **Author's Note: I tried to update earlier, but the internet crashed T^T. Find out what are Nagisa's feelings for Karma next week! Please leave reviews, follow and favorite the story. Goodbye for now!**


	7. Chapter 7 Realization Time!

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 7. Realization Time!**

 **Author's Note: I haven't update in a while since I ran out of ideas. But now I'm back and I'm twice the inspiration! So enjoy!**

Karma didn't come to school the day after that. Nagisa thought it was natural for him to stay at home after what happened yesterday. But at the same time, he felt tired, like he couldn't even move a muscle.

 _If Karma-kun was here, he'd say something like, "Feeling tired?" with that pretty smile of his. I miss h…_

Nagisa shook his head, thinking about and looking over at a certain redhead's table. He tried every single way to get rid of Karma's image in his mind.

 _ **No use.**_

Kayano, one of Nagisa's best friends, certainly noticed that something is wrong.

" _Hey Nagisa! Is something wrong?"_ Kayano asked with concern.

" _Eh, what? Nothing is wrong at all!"_ Nagisa panicked and smiled.

 _There's definitely something wrong._

" _Oh really!? Nagisa, you're the worst liar in the world_ ," Kayano rolled her eyes at his actions.

" _Yeah, I know... If you really want to know, let's talk somewhere private_ ," Nagisa sighed.

Lunch break came, Kayano and Nagisa sat at the corner of the Class E's building with their bento.

" _Are you going to tell me what happened now?!"_ , Kayano ran out of patient as she exclaimed.

" _Fine."_ , Nagisa looked down to his crossed legs and told Kayano about the confession the day before.

To the blue haired teen's surprise, Kayano didn't look shocked or anything at all; instead she just sat there and listened.

" _You're not going to say anything?"_ Nagisa asked. He felt like he just lifted something heavy off of his shoulders.

" _Karma's feelings for you_ _ **was**_ _kind of obvious…"_ , Kayano shrugged.

" _What?!"_ Nagisa was astonished.

 _Did that mean everyone practically knew about it?!_

" _I mean, when he got back to our class, the only person who he said 'hi' was to you. And he was always there to help you when you get bullied by people from the main building_ ," Kayano told him, her analyzations.

" _But I don't have any feelings for him. Besides, we're both guys anyway_ ," Nagisa's voice was trembling; but why did he feel like crying?

" _Are you sure?"_ Kayano asked. It was not her business, but anybody would be curious about Nagisa's feelings in this situation.

" _Huh?"_ Nagisa answered the question with a question, confused.

" _Are you_ _ **sure**_ _you don't have any feelings for him? You seemed like you did_ ," Kayano pointed out softly.

" _Eh? N-No way!"_ Nagisa's face was completely pink. Smoke might have as well blown out of his ears.

Kayano stared at Nagisa for a long time as the boy hopelessly tried to stay calm. Kayano finally continued.

" _You know, I never like anyone before, but I will say what everyone probably would have said. Follow your heart, I guess…"_ Kayano spoke slowly.

The bell rang right after that and they got back to class.

Nagisa couldn't stop thinking about what Kayano said. The same went with Karma.

 _Follow your heart huh? But I don't know what my heart has for me to follow._

After school, Nagisa decided that he will go home and curled up in his bed. But instead walking to the train station, he was running to the opposite direction.

He didn't even understand where he was running to. His mind was completely blank, it seemed only his heart knew what's going to happen, and why he was running.

His heart has the final answer.

The sky was like his feeling, dark and sad. Suddenly, it started pouring. Little drops of rain at first, but a complete disaster the next second. He didn't bring an umbrella, but he didn't care. He just kept running.

Puddles of water on the ground was splashed as Nagisa sprinted by. His breath was short and heavy. His clothes were dripping wet. But he still didn't stop. He felt like he lived to this point just to do this.

He finally slowed down to approach a big mansion in a rich neighborhood.

It was the biggest mansion in the block. The gate was coal black and enormous. The fence was covered with vines, climbing out from the grounds. It's Karma's house.

Nagisa didn't know why he was there either, but he wanted to see Karma. It was just a sudden feeling that he couldn't explain. But he already climb this fence once so it's not a big deal.

A few seconds later, he was already in Karma's yard. He walked to the door and pressed the doorbell.

As Karma opened the door, Nagisa could see the red head's face. Two words- sad and surprised.

" _Nagisa-kun? What are you doing here?!"_

 **Author's Note:** **After reading the new Assassination Classroom update, I realized another good manga is going to end soon, so sad Anyway, I think I'm going to update the next chapter soon. Bye bye!**


	8. Chapter 8 Truth Time

**These Feelings**

 **Chapter 8. Truth Time!**

 **Author's Note:** I decided to do an early update since it's weekend! Thanks to all the lovely readers that have been supporting me this whole time.

" _Nagisa? Why are you here?"_

" _I… It's raining"_ , Nagisa answered. Of course, he's lying. He didn't exactly know why was he there, but he just wanted to see Karma.

Karma didn't say a word, he just clenched his fist and held the door wide open, signaled Nagisa to go in.

Nagisa entered the house.

Last time he was here, it was warm and loving. Sun rays were dancing on the table. At that time, he wanted to stay at the house forever. But now, the house is cold and quiet. All you could here is the rain which was pouring out side.

Karma quietly handed the blue hair teen a t-shirt and a pair of pants.

Nagisa went to the bathroom and quickly change his clothes. Just like last time, the clothes were still big and baggy, but why did he felt so different?

He went back to the family room. Karm was already sitting on one of the couches. There were two mug of hot chocolate on the table.

Once Nagisa was already settled on the couch, Karma gone back to his thinking mode. _Dammit, why is he here? I thought that it would have been fine since I already made that decision. But now,… Fuck! Why does he have to look so cute in my clothes?_

Finally, Karma took a deep breath. He already did a lot of thinking about this, and he was determined to do this.

" _I'm changing school."_

Nagisa looked up from the mug that he has been staring at this whole time. His face could clearly show that he's shock and confuse.

" _Wh… What are you talking about?_ ", Nagisa asked. He believed that he just misheard it, that there was no way Akabane Karma could not be part of class E. But Karma could already sense what Nagisa was thinking.

" _I guess I should repeat that: I'm changing school. And also, we shouldn't be friends anymore."_ , Karma spoke in a blunt and straightforward way. Nagisa fell into silence. The red head continue.

" _My parents are always home every two months. They'll be back the day after tomorrow. I'll speak to them about the matter then."_

Nagisa started shaking now. His mind was repeating the same things over and over, again and again. _No… no… I don't want Karma to leave. I don't want him to. No…_ He stood up. _There's something must be done about this._

Just when Karma was about to continue, ignoring Nagisa's weird behavior, he found the blue hair teen grabbing his arms.

" _What about Koro-sensei?"_ , Nagisa muttered. He felt like losing his sanity.

" _I can try to kill him when he's not at school. You are not necessarily have to be his student to plan an assassination plan on him."_ , Karma said, trying to keep his calm.

" _Don't leave… You are my best friend…"_ , Nagisa mumbled again, feeling breathless. This time, Karma lost his composure.

" _What are you saying?! Don't you get it? I LOVE YOU!... If I become friends with you once again… I can't take it…"_ , Karma narrowed his eyebrow and frowned. He bit his lips. _This is going to be over soon._

" _Jerk…"_ , it's hard to see the nice and sweet Nagisa insult someone by calling them a jerk, but he did.

" _Huh?"_

" _That's right, I'm calling you a jerk! You coward! You're basically running away! You said you love me… but then you ran way! Coward!"_ , Nagisa yelled and shouted. He never felt so angry in his entire 14-years of life.

Karma didn't know what to do. Though Nagisa's grip was hard, the red head could easily escape with a few quick moves. But why would he when he knew that as soon as he snuck out of it, he will be hunt down by an assassin-mode Nagisa? That sounded like the worst plan ever.

Instead, he listened to Nagisa's plead.

 _What does HE have to say? He doesn't have feelings for me, so why would he care? Unless he…_

" _Such a coward… You don't understand how I feel at all…"_ , Nagisa said while clenching his teeth.

Karma heard that. He grinned. His mischievous side was showing. Things were turning his way.

" _Huh? What do you feel?"_ , Karma asked and acted innocent. He leaned forward.

A new layer of pink was on Nagisa's face. He turned away almost immediately.

" _I… don't know."_ Just then, Nagisa realized what was he doing. His face turned even redder than it was before. He released Karma's hands.

But who would have guess when Karma leaned forward and gave Nagisa something.

A kiss.

It wasn't a deep French kiss that makes you paralyze, just a short and light kiss. Karma pulled back after a few seconds or so.

By this time, no one could think Nagisa could look even more embarrassed than he already has. Karma let out a slight chuckle asked:

" _So, do you think you know your feelings yet? Or am I wrong?"_

Nagisa frowned and about to stick out his tongue when Karma continued:

" _I guess I'm wrong. Well, we'll probably never meet again anyway."_

Nagisa pouted and looked down at the ground.

" _Fine,_ _I love you_ _"_

" _What was that? Can you tell me that while looking at me?"_ , Karma asked and smiled, acting all angel-like.

He was expecting a Nagisa who whimped in embarrassment, but instead, Nagisa laughed. A genuine laugh.

" _That's so like you."_

 **Author's Note:** Yep, that's the end. But don't worry, a sequel containing their dates and the times they're together is coming out next Thursday. So I guaranteed that there will be A LOT more fluffs about these guys o Please feel free to leave reviews, favorite and follow the story.


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